Why high street viagra sales are a blessing for poor old biscuit cock

A digestive biscuit

A digestive biscuit

Took the bus into work this moring after leaving the car at the office so I could enjoy a few drinks at a top business networking event last night, organised by Winning Entrepreneurs.

This occasional foray onto public transport meant that I got the chance to flick through today’s copy of the Metro.

The story that caught my eye was on page 12 – announcing that  Viagra will be available over the counter from today in branches of  Boots the chemist.

Which brought back the funniest story I’ve heard in ages – adeptly told by Jim Rae, managing director of document solutions company, Elevate, who was also at last night’s Winning Entrepreneurs barbecue.

The yarn revolved around a couple of blokes striking up a rapport while watching the recent Champions League final in the same bar on the holiday island of Tenerife. As you do on holiday, they arrange to meet up for dinner the following day with wives/girlfriends.

Bloke number one was first in the restaurant with his wife and was left agog a short time later when his new pal turned up with most unbelievably beautiful girl on his arm.

However, it was soon apparent that not only was this angel-like vision a tad common, she was also mouthy and sticking away glass after glass of red wine in short order.

Cue much discomfort when, less than an hour into the meal, the beautiful young woman was slurring, swearing and being generally vitriloic.

At this point her boyfriend leans in and urges her to ease up on the red wine, gently reminding her that they’re out for the entire night. Her searing response was this: “Don’t tell me how much I can drink, biscuit c*ck!”

After a shocked silence the woman turned to the other couple and said: “D’you want to know why I call him ‘biscuit c*ck’? It’s because it only takes one dip and he goes soft.”

Now that’s an insult no man is coming back from.

For the sake of the poor bloke involved, I can only hope this story is apocryphal- one of those urban myth jokes (though I’m sad to report there’s no record of it on the urban myth bible, Snopes.com).

If not, let’s hope he’s ditched the mouthy arm candy and  is celebrating today’s news that the wee blue pills are now freely available on the high street.

In the consolation stakes,  something tells me that a wee cup of tea and a nice McVities digestive (the ultimate dunking biscuit, IMHO) just won’t help in this case.

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