Trinny and Susannah’s Body Shape Bible.

Nice to see that TV clothes horses Trinny and Susannah will be in Glasgow tomorrow (nov 7) to sign copies of their new book. Not renowned for their humility, it is modesty entitled, the Body Shape Bible.

I look forward to hearing the advice for the shape conscious women of Scotland from a couple of posh birds who’ve never had to navigate their way round a diet of fags and fried food.

I know that cardiac wards up and down the country despair of seeing the wee Scottish women whose body shape can only be described as square (not one you often see alongside “hourglass”, “athletic” or “boyish” in the London fashion glossies).

As I recall, Trinny and Susannah first shot to notoriety with their poster campaign where they appeared nude from the waist up, with only amusingly relevant foodstuffs to protect their modesty.

That was a couple of fried eggs for skinny Trinny and a couple of well-rounded melons for curvier Susannah. For square shaped women, Glagow offers the perfect foodie solution - the peculiar Scottish delicay known as Lorne or “square” sausage.